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[personal profile] becala
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d0rks.

So Wes's uninspired name of "2 Nights of Metal in the Forest," became more aptly titled "Wes Stock." For some reason he didn't like the title change, but really couldn't do anything about it. We also called it "BearwoodStock," since Bearwood is his last name, but somehow that extra syllable was too hard for the drunk folks.

His girlfriend Octal was fairly pissy about the event being titled after him since she provided pretty much all of the equipment that caused everyone to have a good time. The previous woods shows were all much more primitive and everyone at them had far less fun. But even without her fancy quick-set-up canopies and kerosene heaters, we could have made it work, given the correct planning and previous experience. A correctly placed bonfire and some tarps + rope could have achieved the same effect with a bit more effort--and some dedicated folks. And a few troopers like Lord Aaron who will help make sure that canopies and kerosene heaters don't get moshed over.

I haven't mentioned it here, but I would really like to make my 33rd birthday in May into something special, and I was definitely thinking about doing something like a woods show, but closer to Olympia so my friends here will actually come. Not sure about good locations here, that are both pleasant camping areas and far enough away from anyone that we won't be likely to be shut down. There is also the possibility of getting actual permission and making the show legitimate, but I haven't really explored that option yet.

Anyway, so May is another month that can be rainy or not, just depending. Octal's huge stage canopies only cost her $150 she said, and they were hella easy to set up compared to the usual types of temporary structures I've seen at various events. Also can look into rental. Or borrow hers, if she's still around. Hard to tell with the security consultant hacker types; they often pick up and move far away on very little notice.

But yeah, other than location, I think the rest of my birthday plans should fall into place fairly easily. I now know more than one person with the proper equipment and skills for a sound setup, I know how to make the setting comfortable even in adverse weather. Rad. I also don't think I will have any problems getting bands. I *might* have trouble getting the band I really want, which is Alda, but we'll see. It'll be okay if I can't get them. Sounds like I can get Tasty Gore. They're recording a new album, and at least Christopher wants to do more woods shows. Bring the kids along maybe.

Other things I think I will do, since this will be the Taurus party:

  • Have a daytime family and sober-people friendly barbecue/pot luck on Saturday.

  • Actual party/show will be Saturday night, and then people are welcome to stay through Sunday to party as well.

  • Have a certain amount of food/drink/energy drinks for sale. I'll just go to costco and get flats of like Luna bars, canned soups, 5 hour energies, and etc. That way people who planned and packed poorly will not leave or be cranky.

  • Consider porta potty rental if we choose a site that doesn't have facilities. No one really suffered a *lot* at the woods show from having to go dig a cat hole, but the distance I had to hike to go take a private shit was a bit inconvenient. And man, I eat a lot of fiber. Going 48 hours without pooping was just not going to happen.

  • Cart in a couple of large trash cans for near the stage.

  • Make announcements throughout the night about picking up your trash so that people like me don't have to organize crews of people to clean up beer cans the next day. Though it was pretty funny to see me directing a bunch of thrash metal guys, in their identical blue denim vests. It was like they were boy scouts or prison labor or something.

  • Have earplugs for sale, both for guarding hearing during the bands, and also so that people can get some sleep when they're done partying and others are not.




What a fucking awesome weekend. I feel sorry for all the wusses that didn't come out because "it might rain." Though I do suspect that the reason *why* it was so much fun is that only hardcore people who don't give a fuck about getting a little bit wet showed up. It was just a bonus that most of us were able to stay dry.

When we showed up on Friday, I was a bit worried that it was going to be entirely lame. We arrived at about 7pm, and at that time there was just Wes and the guys from Decapitated Corpses, who are all about 19 years old, standing under the canopy looking dejected.

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That is me on the far right.

But then right after Eric and I set up our tent and hung an improvised rain canopy near one of the fire pits, the Heavy Metal Short Bus showed up. Seriously, an actual small-sized school bus came screeching into the camp, running roughshod over boulders and crashing through bushes. It finally dumped out a bunch of metalheads holding backpacks and tents, and then proceeded to screech further up the mountain at about 40 mph. Backwards. Around hairpin turns. WHAT.

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Yeah, so things were pretty much awesome from there. More folks started showing up, and the short bus made a few more hilarious and terrifying passes through the main camping area, and then it was time for the bands. Eric got started on his Wizard's Staff, but couldn't convince anyone else to compete, so he pretty much just competed with himself.

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I ended up passing out slightly before Decapitated Corpses finished their set, which was probably about 3am. The music pretty much went on until dawn. Fortunately my 34 decibel earplugs drowned them out and I was able to get some sleep. What can I say, I had been at work since 7am that day. The bands I did see were great. But then I also drank half a fifth of whiskey by myself, so possibly I would have loved anything that I saw.

Saturday I unfortunately woke up at 8am and failed to get even a nap in before the first band started at sundown. (Yes, I had a lot of time to accomplish this, but I had to climb a mountain and blast Dio through the PA instead.)

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Eric got up at 8 with me, but he started drinking beer immediately. His wizard's staff got to level 26 before he finally passed out. Unfortunately level 26 happened about two hours before the bands were going to start, so he slept through the first several. It was pretty interesting, it seems like it was one beer that made the difference between him being fun and talkative, and just confused and zombie-like. Fortunately he is the kind of guy that does go pass out somewhere safe when he needs to, so I didn't really have to babysit him. Really, we would not still be together if I did have to babysit him, a least on a regular basis. Once in a while is okay, as I need it too sometimes. Just not *all* the time.

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Even though I didn't start drinking until a reasonable hour, I still passed out right after the first band and managed to sleep through Evangelist and Tormented Migrations. Oops. I was awake for Shadow of the Torturer, but I've seen them twice now and just hung out in the tent and enjoyed the sludgey ambiance. Plus I could hear the bassist fumbling a bit and decided it was probably not their best set ever.

I finally got up just in time for Tasty Gore. And actually, once they played "Two Nuns in a Chainsaw Fight," I was able to get Eric out of bed. Somehow my just telling him he was missing stuff didn't help, but saying the title of *that* song had him sitting bolt upright and ready to rock again.

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Tasty Gore. Note that the wizard's staff has become stage decoration.

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Having just gotten over some pretty nasty barftime, I thought better of putting more alcohol into my system, and instead engaged in one of my rare evenings of rocking out sober. I cannot believe I stayed standing (and even rocking, in a somewhat subdued manner) until dawn without being at all drunk.

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Phlegathon. Lane means it, Tyler isn't sure, and Ian has a cymbal for a head.

It was worth it though- everyone that played was amazing. Phlegathon was awesome as usual. Unfortunately Lane apparently used all of his energy playing in Phlegathon and became unavailable to play in his other band that was supposed to go next: Nekro Morphosis. The two-piece, very drunk version of NM was "amazing" in its own special way. Special like the short bus that was tearing through the camp site a few times a day. Wes tried to play about 4 songs, but he kept forgetting his own riffs and possibly the words as well, and the drummer Andy was playing the songs correctly, however not in the same timing as Wes's guitar playing. Wes had the sense, despite drunken encouragement, to just QUIT after three half-songs. Unfortunately, sitting through even a cut-short set of Nekro Morphosis caused me to lose all of my built-up energy quite suddenly, and then I felt like one of these guys:



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See that chick in the skirt? That's me. That is how I have to stand to headbang without falling over at 4:30am, even when I am completely sober.

It was rough business, staying standing for Skinwalker, but I'm very glad that I did. Just pure old-school orthodox black metal, with melodic-but-not-too-melodic riffs and tortured screams. Coming from some of the nicest guys I have ever met, by the way. It was definitely a perfect closing for the weekend. Unfortunately, at that time my camera was out of batteries, so no pictures of them. Srsly. Nicest. Guys. Ever.


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THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS TOO TIRED TO ROCK.
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May 2013

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