becala: (Default)
[personal profile] becala
Recently, when I logged onto Netflix, on my recommendation list next to Trancers, The Big Lebowski, Louis CK, and The Dunwich Horror, was: Vanilla Ice: Cool As Ice.

No shit, Vanilla Ice. I don't know what the fuck I watched to make Netflix think I needed to see this film, but if their AI thinks I needs to watch it, who am I to argue? So I put it on. This trailer should give you an idea of what I was in for:



So I watched it. The whole thing. After the cavorting-in-a-construction-site scene, I almost gave up, but ended up making it through the whole thing.

And this is how I felt about it:

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Oh my god those pants.

IMAG0200-1
This film made it all the way through shooting, editing, and being released. By Universal Studios.

P.S. I swear I do not have a lazy eye, just the angle of the camera was weird or something.

Date: 2012-01-30 03:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xraytheenforcer.livejournal.com
O_o

just...

o_O

Date: 2012-01-30 03:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] weakwiththedawn.livejournal.com
Does she have sex with Ice, or his bike?

Date: 2012-01-30 05:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] becala.livejournal.com
As far as I can tell, they lay in the field and trade clothes. Not sure if that's supposed to imply sex or not.

Date: 2012-01-30 07:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] becala.livejournal.com
Also giving myself a high five for using the present tense to describe that to avoid having to figure out the correct past tense of "lay" in this situation. It wasn't even conscious.

Date: 2012-01-30 03:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bork.livejournal.com
I think I have my evening's viewing set up for me.

Date: 2012-01-30 04:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] light-string.livejournal.com
hahahahahahaha thank you for this post.

Date: 2012-01-30 04:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] samjolnir.livejournal.com
Do KAZAAM next. DO IT.

Date: 2012-01-30 05:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dryad271.livejournal.com
OH MY GOD
YOU HAVE MADE MY DAY
I HAVE WANTED TO SEE THIS FOR YEARS
BRB UPDATING MY QUEUE

Date: 2012-01-30 05:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aetherdrifter.livejournal.com
"Vanilla Ice is going to take an uncool world...and chill it...TO THE BONE."

ahahahahaha. I almost kind of want to see this now. XD

Date: 2012-01-30 05:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bork.livejournal.com
Welp, 5 minutes in I can appreciate it as the cinematic masterpiece it truly is. I can't possibly see how this failed at the box office.

Date: 2012-01-30 05:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] onerodetoasabay.livejournal.com
Hiding under a blanket while you watch it--very appropriate.

Date: 2012-01-30 06:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tinaviel.livejournal.com
I think this would be a hilarious thing to watch to fulfill that part of me that absolutely revels in terrible movies (I should get Liam to give it a whirl with me -- we haven't had a Bad Movie Night in a while, though maybe that's because nothing's ever going to rival The Room for us. Ohhh my god, The Room). For now, I just want to say that I like your face(s). These pictures = the making of my night.

Date: 2012-01-30 12:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] becala.livejournal.com
Eric watched the entirety of The Room while we were still living separately and I have been afraid to give it a shot. But based on the reports, it is probably better-paced at least than The Room, and possibly better acted.

Date: 2012-01-30 08:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] becala.livejournal.com
You have seen Troll 2, yes? Oh, also Pumaman. I recommend getting that one in the MST3K version, unless you're watching with particularly clever friends who can fill the same role.
Edited Date: 2012-01-30 08:01 pm (UTC)

Date: 2012-01-30 07:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] clappamungus.livejournal.com
I was going to click that....but then, I thought, "no. I choose life. And sanity." :P

Date: 2012-01-30 12:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] becala.livejournal.com
Probably wise.

Date: 2012-01-30 07:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bork.livejournal.com
I...want that hour of my life back. Wow.

Date: 2012-01-30 12:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] becala.livejournal.com
Have you watched The Room yet? Heheh.

Date: 2012-01-30 01:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] becala.livejournal.com
If you're up for something that's also bad but still engaging, there's also Troll 2. Unless you've already seen it. But really it's worth several viewings IMO.

Date: 2012-01-30 08:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] becala.livejournal.com
I've never heard of this guy. This is pretty good. Probably better than watching the film.

Though he did completely miss the totally fucked up stalker/rapey relationship between Vanilla Ice and his love interest. But then a dude might. And there is so much to make fun of in the movie that that could easily take a backseat to OMG THOSE PANTS.

Date: 2012-01-31 05:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] astillar.livejournal.com
Vanilla Ice gives everyone the lazy eye. Or is it just the ladies? Can't remember . . .

Date: 2012-01-31 11:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chudames.livejournal.com
"I just listen to real rap and doop-it"


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